I wrote to a friend about this a while back. She’d advised that I take an antihistamine. Here’s my response:

“The unclehistamine that works well for me is Claritin D. Of course, you’ve gotta go to the counter and get it and swear on a stack of bibles and give up your life and make a pact with the devil that you will not use it for making meth. You also have to show your driver’s license; leave a tooth impression; have them take your finger, toe and elbow prints; sign, seal and deliver your honor in blood; cross your fingers 13 times while saying, ‘There’s no place like home,’ present a copy of your birth certificate; give your mother’s maiden name or that of your favorite pet; recite your social security number backwards; send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to the charity of your choice (what they’ll do with it I have no clue); play three bars of ‘I’ve Been Working on the Railroad’ on your cell phone; take lessons on how to swallow a pill; prove that you actually have allergies (even though you’ve been sneezing and dripping snot and tears all over the counter); prove that you have not taken any multivitamins for the last 64-1/2 hours; and inhale the gas of five helium balloons and sing the National Anthem while doing jumping jacks and eating five powdered donuts, all in 30 seconds.”

So I don’t take Claritin D.